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Extreme Makeover: Home Edition, the Live-Blog Spectacular

7:52 PM: Really, the question is, how many of the following adjectives will be applicable to the family in question: poor, foster children, parent-in-military, mother with hideous wasting disease, child with bizarre light sensitivity disease, absent father, Lemony Snicket-type orphans, sad baby.

7:56 PM: Thus it is revelaed what motherfucking assholes we are, as EM: HE apparently started an hour ago. It's hysterical, but not the way we thought it would be.

7:57 PM: Did Ed Sanders just say he was going to "bang [that] tight"? Little sexual for Disney, no?

7:59 PM: Sears: Your proud EM: HE sponsor. it this were a magazine, there'd be a little box that says "Advertorial" in the corner. Oh, who are we kidding? No, there wouldn't, actually.

8:00 PM: Ty Pennington is really so ADD. He must drive his camera crew fucking nuts.

8:01 PM: Okay, so we were like an hour late, but: parent-in-military. Right. Why is Ty wearing camo?

8:03 PM: Really, Ty? "There's no way [you] could do what those guys do every day?" You can see every thought on that guy's face happening as it occurs to him.

8:05 PM: It's so great that there's someone who's jointly in charge of "construction/creativity." That's like being in charge of "wallpapering/whimsy" or "flooring/fantasy." The accurate job description would read something like "hot blonde with affinity for camera."

8:06 PM: Ty poking his head over that concrete wall was like Oscar the Grouch popping out of a garbage can. Seriously, he should be a character in a Disney parade.

8:08 PM: We have an endless reserve for EM:HE but our stomach just went a little floo-y with that Harry Potter trailer.

Update #2

What are you doing tonight, around 11 EST? Will you cry, with us, and Ty? Do you want to see a family's dream come true, at lesat until the property taxes are due?

That was not intended to rhyme. But join us, if you like, for our first-ever live-blogging event: the premiere of Extreme Makeover: Home Edition, that most unlikely combination of home design and weeping reality TV stars.

Update

Could it be anything other than the biggest media, design, and crying-orphan event of the year? We speak, of course, about the season premiere of Extreme Makeover: Home Edition, and what we believe will be the world's first EM:HE live-blogging virtual-reality drinking game. We just know this is going to end up with us passed out on the floor, with the neighbor's cat pawing at our face, but until then, it's totally rock and roll. Rock and roll crying-men etc.

But if you have as little to do at, we think, 11 PM EST on Sunday, as we appear to have to do, please come by for a live blogging drinking spectacular.

P.S. This song (links to iTunes) is like a little piece of heaven in musical form. And only $.99!