In today’s Reader Mailbag:

Dear BS:

It is a fashion emergency! I recently found out that I need to wear “cocktail attire” this weekend. Can you tell me: Does this dress qualify as cocktail attire? It’s jersey but it’s black, and I just don’t want to buy something I’m not going to get any more wear out of. I’ll wear it with nice shoes! Will this qualify? Please help!

Love,
D.

In our opinion, people can wear whatever they want to whatever they want, and one of our saddest moments was not wearing jeans to our (cocktail-attire) high school reunion, because the one person who did looked totally excellent and above it all, which was precisely the right response to the event. But then there are weddings, and you don’t want to piss anybody off, and work events, where it’s not worth your boss getting pissed at you. So anyway.

So sure, we say. It’s black. Will anyone be looking at it that closely? Probably not, we’re betting. There’s no denying it’s pretty casual, but … there’d be a lot more wear to get out of it, probably. It’s sort of a no-brainer, we’re thinking: If it’s not going to be a personal fashion event, and you’re going to play it safe, we don’t think you could go far wrong with this, or like any other black jersey dress for summer.

But: other opinions! Please!

Dress above: Splendid, $101

We are forgetting, and yet we must not, that we have a special 25% off code for Shopping Paris Mode. Discounts! Must be entertained!

Can we add here that we recently had a yoga class next to a woman who turned out to be French, and before we realized this, she had all of her clothes in a pile on the floor (this is in changing room, right) and they looked like rags, or laundry, and then she put them all on in some bizarrely together French way and we were like: ‘French. Yes.’ National stereotypes are bad, bad, bad, but we couldn’t help but engage in them at that moment.

DEU embroidered top, was $268, with discount code JOUR-REDU-FETE-MERE $201

These aren’t as cheap as we like our shorts to be, and they’re not fancy-dress-up shorts for the office, if the office allows such a thing, but these may well be our shorts of the summer. We are quite confident about this. As we typically limit our shorts to (a) American Apparel porn-shorts and (b) shorts we have cut from existing jeans, we are also excited to discover shorts we will be able to wear outside without embarrassing our friends.

J. Crew summer-weight shorts, $48

We do not really have a ‘tote bag of the day’ category. We are a little frazzled because we are supposed to be packing, and we are watching TV. This is why we miss so many flights.

Anyway! Adorable. Possible the most expensive thing we have ever seen on Fred Flare. But. Still. Adorable!

31 Corn Lane Sunset tote, $48

We were just about to say that we were tired of spring sales. But honestly. We’re not. We’re tired of packing. We’re tired of Paul Wolfowitz. We’re not tired of sales.

So anyway: We have really become huge fans of dressses with pockets. Rebecca Taylor Knit shift dress, was $283.00, now $198.10

We are so into stripes right now. We are even more enjoying striped sweaters over striped tank tops. This is part one of our plan. Splendid cami, was $46, now $36.80

We usually just gravitate straightaway to the jersey tops. We’re just like: ‘Buttons? Really? In summer? But we could spend that time going to the beach, etc’. But we like this one. What is it with all these tops hitting so low? They demand skinny jeans, and nothing else, in our opinion. Lauren Moffat top, was $286, now $200.20

We are trying to get over the skinny jean thing. We are not quite there yet. And at least for our hips, we demand skinny jeans with all these low-sitting tops. Denim for Immortality Aphrodite jeans, were $198, now $138.60

Our natural inclination is so anti-these shoes, but we keep seeing and loving them on other people. Dolce Vita Madeira wedges, were $105, now $73.50

There is so much cool stuff here we may do a part two. But in the meantime, find the complete sales-y collection here.

In today’s Reader Mailbag:

Dear BS,

I know this is random, but I am looking for a new hair conditioner—I used Aveda’s Elixir for years, and now I can’t find it anywhere! Also, a new book to read. Can you help?

A.

We share the disturb-ment, as we too really like Aveda’s Elixir. According to, er, eBay, it’s been discontinued! (Though at least one seller is letting go of a bottle … for $59.99. It’s great, but … seriously. We frown on price gouging.)

Personally, we will return to our old friend from Kiehl’s, Creme with Silk Groom. Isn’t that the strangest description ever? What is “silk groom”? In any case, it works, and though it’s a little pricey, we have v long hair and we go months without needing a fresh batch. CwSG, $17.50

We are going to ask Aveda what the nearest replacement to Elixir is, but in the meantime: Who has any ideas?

Sale time continues. Today: Intermix. We need to say that we totally thought that was a parrot on her shoulder, but minus the “fabric ties” conflagration there, we love the colors in this dress. M Missoni dress, was $595, now $399

Welcome choice between skinny and cropped and pleasingly flared. Citizens bootcuts, were $155, now $99, and Seven copped jeans, were $145, now $99

We don’t love them as much as last season’s Chloe sandals but these will do. Though for $600+ perhaps “will do” is not sufficient. Chloe sandals, were $668, now $499

We want to cry whenever we hear Lily Allen get all sad about how fat she is, since she is not fat, and we want her instead to be more Beth Ditto-ish about it and tell all those horrible starlets who lie about how much they eat to go fuck themselves. We are hoping she grows into her role as an ass-kicker, because we think she is adorable. And we love her peep-toe shoes. We swear, all she ever wears are peep-toe shoes and big yucky high-tops. We love the former and are totally getting a pair tomorrow.

We love these. Aldo really is our mall-footwear store of choice. The Mardin, $69.99

We love the colors here. The problem is that unlike the others, the kind Lily wears, they have a calf-widening ankle strap, and we are not sure we approve of that. Berry peep-toes, $358

We are thinking of these as the super-luxe amazing pair. But still, you know, basics. Jimmy Choo open-toes, $565

Platform! Fun! We are manufacturing a bit of our enthusiasm here. Guess peep-toes, $110

In today’s Ask the Stylist:

BS!

Need advice super-quick. I will be quick: Pool party, under $50, bikini, sunglasses and shoes. And I live in the middle of nowhere, so am limited to lame big-box stores. Can you help?

We can try. At least our stylist can.

“I guess I’ll be equally fast, since everyone seems to be in a rush. I think these shoes are pretty hot. The wedge heel is hot. These can be tricky on the calves but I actually think they flatter people more often than they don’t.” Target Mossimo wedges, $24.99

“Just to be clear, this is not my favorite bikini out there, but it is the only way we will get this all in under $50.” Women’s bikini, $25. [BS note: We made that picture sort of small on purpose. If you ask us, she's taking this budget thing a little too literally.]

“And I am buying these as soon as possible.” F21 sunglasses, $5.80

We’re thinking that’s it for this week. Got a question for our stylist? She would be pleased to address it. Email us here.

Hurrah! And so begins summer. We loooove summer. And we are going to especially love this summer because we have arranged a whole! Series! Of discount codes! And Shopping Paris Mode is just the first for the season. (We recently discussed them recently regarding their April, May line, which is super excellent.) Anyway, we begin with this dress. We love that this model is not anorexic. Why can’t we have non-anorexic models here? Why do the French get everything?

Anyway. Cute dress! And just for us: 25% off! Actually, the whole site (minus shipping, they tell us) is 25% off. This is just today’s suggestion. Nothing says summer like a black dress and big sunglasses, we’re thinking, unless it’s sitting in a hot car at one of the toll booths on the Parkway.

This is the Eurythmic Mia dress, formerly $175, with discount code JOUR-REDU-FETE-MERE (we know it’s a little more unwieldy than usual, and we swear this is special for us—without the intervention the Fete Mere code would have expired tomorrow. In case we were sounding like ass wipes) $131.25

Related posts:

The Summer Black Dress
Summer Black Dresses, Continued
Introducing (To Us, At Least) April, May